Here I am, my first WHITE CHRISTMAS! :)
Toronto is beautiful. The experience of being here has been everything I expected -- and more. Of course, my nerves got the best of me because of the temperature being
9 degrees when we landed. However, the weather is the least of my worries. I am properly equipped with lots of layers and good company.
Being here has definitely put my life into such an amazing perspective. I have experienced a lot, within just the few days that we've been here. I am overwhelmed with joy, confusion, hope, and surprise. Something about this place that makes me feel so happy. The architecture, the weather, the French, and the calm of life is invigorating.
So far, I have explored the underground tunnels of Downtown, which are incredible. I could stay there all day -- and have. I went to the CN tower with my good friend Brance. It was so much fun. You could see all of Toronto over 147 stories. There was a tiny little island covered in snow and trees which was breathtaking. As well as a spot on the water that was lit up by the sun which I took many pictures of. Such a fun day for Brance and I.
Then later on, Emily and JW got a real Christmas tree put up in their room. We had an arts and crafts night, where we all made various ornaments. I have to say, I was proud of my ornaments. (Pictures comin' soon.) But that moment in that room, I finally felt Christmas.
You know that feeling you get inside? That Christmas spirit. I dunno. I used to feel it a lot when I was a kid. When my brothers used to come visit me from Florida, and I would help them wrap presents, or put up the Christmas. Maybe it's because since William died, our Christmases' have been celebrated without any life, decorations, or any spirit. Which is understandable, I suppose. Our family is missing a big part of what it used to have, so I suppose some part of whatever "tradition" we did have, is somewhat trickling away.
Anyways, this night with my cast plugged it for me. I guess because we were all being silly, and doing random arts and crafts. But all laughing and listening to music. Then it started SNOWING! It was really nice. Probably one of my favorite moments on tour thus far.
Seeing the snow has been life changing. I'm not kidding! It might sound funny, but growing up without anything like this at all, I feel like a child again. What I did NOT enjoy was seeing the homeless out in the snow. I got choked up a few times seeing how many homeless people had to deal with the weather. I can't even continue to write about it. I wish there was something I could do immediately.
We had our opening night tonight. It went wonky. I swung in as Birthday Who tonight, which went as well as it could, I suppose. But technically, I seriously dunno how to explain what happened tonight. Or our experiences with the theatre. It was hella funny though.
We have one week until Christmas. I am filled with excitement, but also filled much with sadness that my mom will be alone this year without me. Being on tour has taught me much about sacrifices, and this is definitely one that I am making. I know I will be able to make it up to her, but this is literally the first Christmas without her. It saddens me greatly
-- but this is what I chose to do. I must be grateful that I am employed by a wonderful company, surrounded by really loving, talented and creative individuals, and in a gorgeous city. With snow.
I look forward to the next few weeks and will certainly take my time to thank God for putting me in such a great mental place. I have a lot of considering to do in regards to many aspects of my life, but somehow, I feel positive and uplifted about it.
Onto a 4 show day tomorrow. Our LAST 4 show day! I will NOT miss these, to be truthful. Hella exhausting ass shit!
Until next time.